point break / Sunday, August 24, 2008
i dunno why, it seems i am a selfish retarded asshole who just wont give a rest till i get something.
i always pressure you why cnt u do this why cnt u do that.
i tend to be over sensitive eventhough i said i understand u.
fucked.
everytime i quarrel with u, my heart torn into pieces. i hate myself for loving so. but i cnt change the fact. the fact of you couldn't able to meet my demands. but at the same time i'm contradicting myself, i told u not to rebel your mum.
DAMNED.
our relationship has reach to a pt where emoing doesn't help. shutting urself from the world from me isn't going to help.
WACK me tell me i'm selfish
SCOLD me tell me i'm all u ever wanted
YELL at me tell me that what i wanted was 2 hard for you and i should understand
SLAP me tell me that i'm behaving like a bitch in this kind of situation where i keep ask ask ask ask ask ask when i know u didn't wan to say
how i wish that would be the way we communicate.
be yourself
i know ur unglam
i know ur noisy
i know ur irritating
SHOW me in the face
i promise i nvr leave you
yet u doubted me in some way or another
i dun even feel my effort wasted, i just feel fucked. by what ? i dunno
i'm not even comparing
i wan a simple dinner
i wan a simple date
i wan a simple cinema movie date
i wan a simple sharing session with u
i wan so many so many simple things that many pple are taking a lifetime searching their partner to do with them.
i am willing to be like my brother to sacrifice for you.
u always think i'm unhappy.
do u know i'm so despising myself?
i did put myself in your shoe.
i did and i am still doing it.
ur factors stopping you. i know i understand.
but why? why? why cnt we just SKIP LESSONS for 1 day! and just hold the hand and walk in whatever park we find whatever road we cross whatever food we eat. even taking 154 till the end of its terminal would be so sweet.
i'm despising myself WHY WHY WHY i cnt help u improve the situation ur in
ur mum
ur sis
ur dad
ur bro
ur frens
ur exams
am i helping? no
i am adding burden.
i am such a big burden that make you immobilize.
all your promises to open up.
yup once in a blue moon.
am i gaining sympathy? no
i wan to let u know, being silent wont be a good thing.
i am not a monster
if someone u love, yet u cnt open up to them, i dunno what i can do.
1 joke when being repeated 2-3 times, it gets retarded.
yet i have to be the one who keep telling them cause u nvr talked.
all the obstacle ahead, i promised u i will overcome with u
i had say it over and over again.
but it time for u to WALK with me
the journey is ours
the love is ours
i'm yours
you're mine
make the first step
i cnt go on alone
your missing me, i dunno how much i have no idea but i know it cnt be lesser than mine. yours might be greater. but i believe we can overcome all sort of stuff.
tears filled up my eyes,
alone in the night, the feelings is so intense i feel like killing myself. so i can just see you now.
my hearts yearn for no one but u.
damned i typed too much
/this is the only thing that i fear.
12:16 PM
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